1 post tagged “humor”
First off, spam (of the mail or email variety) is bad. As an IT consultant with several email addresses and information about me scattered around the internet, I get plenty of it.
Due to the way I have my email systems configured, most of it gets identified immediately and sent into a spam folder. On occasion I'll review them -- 1) to make sure they're really spam, and 2) for amusement. Some friends of mine and I will share the subject lines of some of the more outrageous spam we receive with each other.
I NEVER forward the spam messages. Why not? I don't want to contribute to the spam epidemic by clogging the internet with another unnecessary copy of the offending email. I don't want someone to unsuspectingly get phished by the content in a spam message. I don't want someone I know to accidentally get infected with an attached virus. I don't want to be identified by some automated system as a spammer myself. etc. etc.
As of late, it seems the spam I (or anyone I know) receives is focused into just a few categories:
"check out this porn", "enhance your male-ness with this", "get your pharmaceuticals from us over here", "buy this luxury watch", "get some cheap software", and "incomprehensible nonsense". And it's pretty much in that order (as far as the number of spam emails I get). The funniest ones are typically in the first two categories. I've no idea what's up with the watch thing. I've been amazed by how much "watch spam" I get, but it must work otherwise the spammers wouldn't be sending it. But sometimes I'll get a spam email that just contains random words. I imagine a phishing link is sent along with those, but I've never really checked (they're obviously spam, so I just delete them).
So anyway, I just cleared out my spam folder and here are the gems (actual letter-for-letter spam subjects):
Great pics of bosoms
Shoot your load further
Fire up your rocket today
Shoot harder and further with this
Your male device is super
Michael Jakson glued up a person a plaster
Your bazooka will explode her
Time to repair your male plumbing
thus allowing more blood to enter the cavern creating a longer and thicker erection.
re: pink, wet and 18
Hanging long and hard
Fondle all her internal nerve endings
Having a larger rocket in your pocket gives you more confidence both in life and around women.
Ever heard the sound of a huge one slapping against a tight woman's butt?
While reading these I thought my favorite was "your male device is super" until I got to the bazooka one!
The nerve endings one is kind of creepy. As is the blood cavern one!
Enjoy!
